The Calm Conflict Starter Kit Is Here!
Calm conflict ahead...When your relationship is stuck in a cycle of fight after toxic fight, it's hard to imagine expressing hurt, articulating concerns, and resolving disagreements without exhausting, messy arguments. But not only can conflict be healthy, it can actually be a source of deep connection. The kind of connection that sustains your relationship. Fighting can make your relationship stronger. The way you fight matters. The tools you have for conflict determine whether you can move through it fluidly or whether you get stuck in quicksand of resentment, defensiveness, and attacks. I am passionate about helping couples change the way they fight. I want you to experience the intimacy of healthy conflict. So I made you a starter kit to help you start shifting your conflict patterns today. It's totally free. Snag the Calm Conflict Starter Kit Now. |
More Conflict Help From The Blog Here's to breaking free of destructive conflict. Dr. Marina Dr. Marina Rosenthal, PhD, LP @drmarinarosenthal connect@drmarinarosenthal.com www.drmarinarosenthal.com |
Dr. Marina Rosenthal
Licensed psychologist helping couples learn how to fight fair.
I recently polled my audience about what psychological jargon you argue with your partner about the most. The most common answer - gaslighting or its more academic cousin DARVO. So let's dig in. At this point, I don't think I need to explain what gaslighting is - it seems to have pervaded the cultural discourse. Less pervasive in mainstream culture (but rising!) is the scientific concept of DARVO, pioneered by Jennifer Freyd in 1997 (who, fun fact, was my fabulous mentor and advisor while...
A recent viral instagram post lead to a dialogue around whether stonewalling is abuse. Here's my thoughts. Last week I posted a few sample texts you can send your partner if they are stonewalling you. Stonewalling is one of the Gottman's "Four Horsemen" - harmful relationship behaviors that predict divorce. Stonewalling happens during conflict when one partner becomes so physiologically "flooded" (feeling intense emotions they don't have the tools to cope with) that they shut down....
Over on instagram, my community recently had a really interesting chat about yelling during fights. Not yelling *at* your partner - I think for the most part we are in agreement that if possible, let's not scream at each other in anger. But what about yelling for emphasis? What about yelling because you're feeling strong emotions? What about people who speak loud when they have a point to make? What if yelling is part of your culture? I heard from people on both sides of this equation. Some...